parks of theme.. jurassic in style.. maybe? or a can of worms i didn't even know i opened

lately, i've stopped reading as much
but i've watched more.. if that computes.
but yeah
i
today
today was a very long day. three hours sleep, bike rode till i tore a ligament
and work
and jurassic park
as i hard as i try it always comes back to jurassic park
i think if you dig theme parks jurassic park really resonates with you. and i do, like theme parks.
no i love em'
people have said thats lame. or judge me based on it. like how lame it is to go to some all inclusive resort that shields you from the country you actually visit but just gives you a beauty of a view.
no, for a fee people can shield you from the poverty and shit that makes living a life in most places on this planet unbearable. but fuck people go. of course.
don't judge the payers for these things. don't say they are shallow, although most certainly can be, or they're bad people.
i would totally go all unclusive in a country rife with political and social unrest. its what you got to do.
listen kiddies were not saving the world be living in a first country with all the benifits of fine dine living. if you can afford to just "enjoy a view" then please be all means take it.
its our only chance. really its our only chnace to just connect to this damned planet of ours. and in that snapshot of beauty. no matter how over played a beach in jamica is over the mountains of asia it's still fucking beauty.
you must and need to find it where you can.
its all we got left. just such beauty.
the world is shit. dont ever forget.
but a all inclusive resort or a theme park doesnt make me forget that, it just reminds me of what dreams could come on our planet.
an all inclusive resort can give us such snapshots to know how beautiful our planet is.
a theme park can show the fantastic imagination of human kind.

in short, just because you aren't backpacking through the worst of south america but are instead sitting on a beach in west africa where all your food and drink is already paid for, don't feel so fucking guilty.
this is our world. this is what was made before any of us presently living had a say. and yes it should change and yes we all should have a chance to experince such pleasures.
but just because you think your summer vacay away was "inspirational" doesn't make my trip to universal studios "disgusting"
i, like you, found beauty.
now please got out my face, if i had richer parents you'd be more quiet

Why is it so hard to Take?

Life, in reference to the title. why? the other day i was sitting, drunk in muy backyard, smoking and getting away from my memories and false hopes and i saw a bumblebee, one of my favourite creature, laying, broken on the ground, its waing no longer able to fly. i loked at it for a long time looked at its inability to fly anymore and it made me so sad. like a boy bouncing a ball waiting for someone to join in or a girl looking for a prom date or me. i stepped on the poor bastard to put him her out o fits misery, not wantimng trhe ants to eat it alaive. it was one of the saddest moments i have experienced in a long time. why is that? why does the death of somethning so small mean so much? ahhh such a quewstion! because these things mean to us and to me christ almiighty i need to leave online networking behind and die an e death, dont want it anymoir,. don'tr wabnt to be coonected or anything. it will only cause heartache and tired masterbation that only causes well, i said that already didnt i? smashing myselfd in bars around town doesnt help and after too much to drink i',m still too fucking lucid. where is the angel of forgetfulness, so i can stop bothering all yuo peoiple with my frustratiomn and need. it isn't at the bottom of a pint nor is it in time nor knowing nor anything. i tear my hair out. i tear my heart out. i want to. smashimng and smashing agian and agian where is my giant rabbit and soundtrack. staring atr fucking keys on a jkey board i write aat length in a diary and hate mys4elf and drink and sm,okje. christ almighty i'm such a loser and and .........and. last action hereo. i spent the last two days watching his movies and thinkng why. it isnt fun and i dont do it on puurposae aND am i nice guy i think hope want to be. now i get stoned. feelin good, feelin oh, so fine, until tomorrow but that just some other time.

dodge balls

i've been dropping balls all over the place lately.
Mostly because i don't want to play anymore.
No, it's more like i was picked to be on the "skins" team, and i really dont want to take off my shirt. fucking gym teachers

holy MOLY

I'm drunnk and its 1 53. in toronto, god is dead and theres no one to love.

The Depths of Depravity

i have watched some docs about bdsm and how far that can go, and the dark underbelly of jap prostituition. they are unhappy. like me. way to go human race, you sick group you.
on my own level i pray for more monday nights, please come back. i'm so goddamned good, and willing.