it's so weird now. the world is so strange.

I jest and mock and poke and scoff.
I wonder if she hates me yet?

It's hard not having a best friend anymore. Before, things were so simple we were there for the each other. it was the be all and end all. now i find it hard to even make strong connection with any female companion. i have yet to find someone who i feel is worth it for me to care about.

and i like her, really i do. but she's not a best friend. more like a little sister. the little sister you want out of your room when you're alone with a boy. yet the sister you are more than willing to passon wisdom and advice too. it's just hard to be tell the everything nd be comfortable with all the time friends with someone who just isnt on the same wave length as you.

now its getting harder on me. im snapping. gtting irritated too quickly. i dont want to spend free time with her. and somehow i do feel bad, even guilty about this. i just dont know if i can keep going through the motions when the emotions arent there.

maybe there is some sort of shelter for lost friends; people who come from abused friendship or whose hearts were abandoned in a cardboard box on the side of the 416. maybe i could go there and sleep in a little cage with regular intervals of happy-but-alone until some nice friend comes along and wants to adopt this relationship. and they'll feed me and walk me and take me out to play. and we'll be really happy and grow old in friendship.
(wo)man's best friend